For many years I have been accustomed to going on retreat – taking some days for a step back from my usual routine to reflect and be recollected in God’s presence, and to be nourished bodily and spiritually. Contracting Covid recently made me realise how much I needed a retreat again. It forced me to slow down and reflect and listen to my body.
After beginning a full-time job four months ago my routine became busier, and though I have tried to keep up the activities which I am committed to and enjoy, I heard a little voice in my heart telling me something had to give. I felt I was beginning to experience the symptoms of burnout – physical and emotional exhaustion.
Travelling recently to work by bus prompted me to take a step back. Although the journey took longer, it was much more relaxing. I don’t think I had pondered how tiring driving a round trip of 88 kilometres by car each day can be. The bus on the other hand offered the opportunity to be still and notice the beauty of the country roads and of getting to know the area, while also affording some exercise in walking to and from the bus stop.
It also made me think of the blessings of the past four months such as the ‘mini-retreats’ I spent exploring locations of natural beauty or in the beautiful churches that I’ve been privilieged to spend time in along my route to work. At those times I was able to recharge my batteries and give thanks for all the people who help and encourage me.
Life felt more peaceful when I stopped, to take time to rest for a while, even 30 minutes. I wasn’t rushing from A to B, from one town to the next – just enjoying the stilness. Even one hour of stillness I find does wonders for the soul. I thought of the time I sat by the river or the lake watching the sunset. Or the times I stopped in the church in the country village on my way home for Mass and Eucharistic Adoration.
After contracting COVID I felt my body was telling me to slow down. In the space of 48 hours life slowed down to snail’s pace and I experienced something akin to a ‘stay-at-home’ retreat. It brought me back to the lockdown periods of 2020-21 and to the therapuetic activities I did then to help me cope such as baking, cooking, cleaning, listening to my favourite genres of music, particularly Christian music, and watching Mass online from different churches.
These activities helped me to slow down, go easier on myself and restore peace and calm in my heart. I have peace in my heart when I have spiritual peace. It is prayer and the sacraments of the Church, attuning myself to the presence of the Holy Spirit, that helps me to maintain this peace. I feel faith in God offers hope and trust in a higher power, in the hope and belief in life after death, amidst the sometimes busy nature, troubles and chaos of our world.
